03.04.02//my very first immunity challenge... sounds somewhat like a childrens book, no?
beats !!

IC # 1

sitting on the boat on my way to the Diary Survivor Island (being that it's an island, one must travel to it by either plane or boat, and since i am waaaahaayyyy too cheap for a plane, boat it is!), i am so anxious/nervous/butterfliesinmystomachy that i am practically having a seizure. i see the island in the distance, but it still seems so far away...and it doesn't seem to be getting any closer...maybe because the boat is going, like, one onethousandth of a mile per year? yeah, so i get a little sick of waiting, and i jump in. i may suck at swimming, but anything is faster then staying on that boat. plus, swimming burns calories! so anyway, i swim to the island, and, exhausted, i scramble ashore. i fix myself up as best as possible, and attempting to maintain composure (impossible at a time like this), i set off in search of my fellow survivors.

man, i am so nervous.

SO nervous.

there they are...THERE THEY ARE I SEE THEM! oh jesus lord, here i go!

i approach them. i see a table with one sticker left on it, which says "Hi, I'm Confruzzled!". how convenient! i think, and put my sticker on. now, i am totally ready for anything.

so i look around. to my left: what's that? is it a plum? is it barney? no, it's Throcky! to my right: a girl wearing a Gilmore Girls shirt, which i presume must be Mariel. i hope she's taping the show while we're here...if she is, i'll have to bum me some of those tapes! directly in front of me: oh. my. god. i must be dreaming. AllTheRage, you are a god. and quite a beautiful one at that. i can tell we'll get along (if you know what i'm sayin' hunny). just don't tell anyone that it's statutory rape. we can be like that Alanis Morisette song!

beyond them, i spot TVZero, who ain't so bad either. i know dino spit turns ME on, shiiiiiit....

next to him is LampShade, dressed very fashionably in her Hawaiian sarong and eating sushi (a mixture of my two favorite "cultures"...remind me to tell you the story of Queen Chickadee of Hawaii and Queen Sushi of Japan). i immediately approach her and, not asking, i take a piece of sushi for myself. she must think me so rude! sorry lamp, i couldn't resist. sushi is like, my other half!

still beyond them, and a little to the left, resides MyChai. he looks a little more in place in his boxers *here* than in the snow. also comfortable with her surroundings is Tickle-Me-BB, who must be used to the heat, being that she's from Australia and all. i can't wait to hear her accent! man, Aussie country is so cool...i wonder if she's ever seen a Koala Bear? how bout a Kangaroo?

unlike myself, i saw Racer96 maintaining total composure. i knew his ability to do this must be due to the fact that he has seen it all... even guys being arrested! yet, for some odd reason, he kept throwing his hands up in the air... sort of like this o/ .

i see JeniStar as well. at first, i am afraid to approach her - anyone without a sex drive *must* have something wrong with them! then, gathering up my courage, i walk up to her, and give her a piece of my mind. no teenage boy will ever go forty days without sex while i'm around!

then, i see them. scared, and not knowing what to do, i hide. who are these people that i might be so scared of, you ask? why, none other than MilkMaid and KitchenLogic. an explanation of my fear? let's just say "mommy".

equally perturbed by the mothers on the island is Mattu.

note to self: become excellent friends with Mattu - might be able to officially provide you with beer.

i look up. what's this? is that Malkavia? why is she sitting atop a tree? she must feel outcasted because she's no longer a diarylander. but look, there goes RavenWord to help her down and make her feel a part of things. that ravenword, always doing the right thing! what a sweet girl.

finally i post-it notes? oh oh oh, that must be LadeeLeroy. it's good to see something...different? on this island. PS, leroy, we are like, twins. one of my eyes is bigger than the other too! except my right eye is i guess we're more fraternal.

wow. what an awesome group of people! i hope no one can see me hyperventilating. oh wait, of course they can't - i'm still hiding behind a bush from the mommies. it's time to get over my fears and come out! so i emerge and begin to socialize. i have to comment on the weather 16 different times to 16 people, but hey, it gives me a chance to be creative! did you know a nice day can be described in at least 16 ways? well, as i found out, it suuuure can!

it's starting to get late, so all us survivor's decide it's time to call it quits for tonight. we bid eachother sweet dreams and all that nonsense, and retire to our "quarters", to feast on rice and sleep on the hot sand. but as i lay my head on my sand mound of a pillow, i am...brought back to reality? and realize that i am not on a deserted island of sorts, but am sitting at my computer, and have been for the past two hours, typing an entry in my diary.

ow! stupid carpel tunnel syndrome.